All I want for Christmas is


I love this season!
Perhaps it’s because I was in India last year and didn’t see a single TOMTE or Pepparkaka. But when I come to think of it, the thing I long for most is to be with my family.

But it hasn’t always been like this!

I remember my strong yearning for Independence at a very young age. Having big fights with my mom over things like: Clothes, boys, going clubbing, talking on the phone for hours and hours so that NO ONE in the household could get into contact with the outside world… you probably remember that to ☺. I was never at home. Left for school at 6.30am, went straight to my dance school and then to my boyfriend. Every now and then I came home to change clothes and to hide the NEW clothes that I bought (mom always thought I bought way to much clothes, that haven’t changed).
I moved to South Africa when I was 17. After that I never want back home to my “flickrum”.

What happened? Why do we change from wanting to be as far away from our parents as possible to longing to be with them, consulting them over the phone when we can’t be together, asking for advice in life, work, love, you name it!

I guess there are several reasons but for ME there is one event that changed it all!

My father past away in the summer of 2005. After 10 years of illness. I saw my HERO, my role model, my everything slowly whither away. As his body slowly withered away his mind only grew stronger and so did his heart! He went from being my PHYSICAL hero, once voted “THE SEXIEST MAN IN SWEDEN” a real womanizer, to being my GURU. And he still is today!

Not a single day passes without an image of his smile, one of his jokes, his eyes. I am forever grateful for this life!

But still I can’t deny the fact that:

ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS is one more day with you!

Yes, my heart belongs to Daddy
So I simply couldn't be bad
Yes, my heart belongs to Daddy
Da, Da, Da, Da, Da, Da, Da, Da, DAAAAD

ps. I love you



Helena said...

Rörande... Plötsligt blev jag ännu gladare över att jag har tagit upp kontakten med min pappa. TACK.
Du verkar så stark Jo - go girl!

Anonymous said...

Johanna, jag blev såå rörd...vilken vacker text....vilken vacker pappa.....vilken vacker Johanna. Hjälper inte mkt med mina led-ord för livet: LYCKA ÄR ATT FÅ LÄNGTA. Känns orättvist att inte få kunna dela stunder med den som betydde mest..ever again.
Men i tanken, och det är ju tanken som räknas. Någonstans finns dom alltid med oss, våra älskade pappor.
Gott Slut o Gott Nytt, ditt lilla krutpaket//mary